A few things about Greg

For one thing he has 613 unread emails in his inbox. Who could stand it?

I felt a bit sorry for the guy last week. He had a few creepy experiences all in a cluster and every now and again I'd glance his way and notice he was getting the heeby-jeebies and a shiver would run down his spine and he'd groan quietly with a memory.

Under the supervision of our neighbour (who grew up on a farm and knows all the tricks of the trade) Greg was the one to finalise the rooster. He had to dislocate the neck and all that stuff. I wouldn't have liked to be in his place but he was all brave about it and said "the first ones the hardest." Poor guy.

Now this isn't just to freak out my foreign readers who already think that Australia is full of deadly animals, this is the God honest truth. Last Friday night when Greg was replacing a few screens around the house he went out the back door to see what tools he'd need to take it off it's hinges, I was putting Anakin to sleep and I heard him make this really unusual guteral sound which prompted me to sing out (which is something you don't do for just any reason when you're trying to put the baby to sleep) "Greg! What happened?" I wasn't expecting his reply of "A snake just fell on my head!! Bring me a torch and a rag!" I think he must of disturbed it when he got the spare flyscreen out of the ceiling (yes we use every possible cavity in this tiny house for storage) and it must have been making it's way outside. Actually we don't really know where the bloody hell it came from. It just kind of dropped on his head from outta nowhere. Bizzaroworld. We kept it for a day and then it escaped from it's box!

And then Monday evening he was transplanting some paw-paw trees when I get more orders shouted out at me "Bring me a bottle! A spider just bit me!" It was an ugly looking thing too. Greg was sitting here googling North Queensland spiders trying to identify it with his arm all wrapped in a tourniquet, waiting for the symptoms to set in. I had a hard time seeing where it had actually bit him and was giving him shit about living on borrowed time. We're pretty sure it was a Trapdoor spider. Luckily we didn't mistake it for something deadlier because I'm sure Greg would've easily manifested some swelling, numbness or dizziness. I'm not very sympathetic at times, I just take the piss. Like you didn't notice ;p

I'm surprised he didn't lie down on the floor and refuse to move a muscle in case the poison spread faster. He doesn't usually need an excuse to lie down on the lino. The number of times I've been looking around for Greg and all you can see of him his his two work boots sticking out of a doorway. He can just stop everything, lie down on the floor on the spot, and be fast asleep in two seconds. For someone like me, who doesn't really get all that much sleep and sometimes suffers insomnia it's really a wonder to behold. I've said it before but he is really missing a brainwave cycle. From one moment to the next he goes from being awake, to closing his eyes, making a few involuntary jerks and then is fast asleep. It's unreal. He can sleep for 90% of his half hour lunch break at work. He just finishes eating, puts his head down on the smoko table and goes straight to sleep. The siren goes to start work again and he just carries on sleeping. A couple of times all the other lads leave quietly and then watch him through the window to watch his startled reaction when he wakes up. (Once to find the foremen having a conversation over the top of him!)

Man, I had this mammoth (well okay maybe not in your terms, friggin 12 k's on a cross trainer, or some serious marathon training would actually kill me I reckon) workout on my girlfriends treadmill yesterday with my heavy leg weights on. It was a total killer. I was almost crying at one point. Anyway ever since I've had this weird equilibrium thing going on like I've just spent 2 weeks on a boat. And yes, I have made an offer on that treadmill (and a cross-trainer too). Only coz the weather around here is so wet and unpredictable and I've gotten on a bit of a roll with the exercise regime and don't want to let it slip. Plus me and Greg have a bit of an idea in mind about setting up a good gym. We're well on the way already, with the leg press he built, cable cross-overs, spinner, weights bench, punching ball and bag... couple more cardio machines and we'll be all decked out and put the local gym to shame.